crossmyheartandhope

Right? Pretty sure we hit our quota on those.

Yeah...

[pauses]

...You been doing okay lately?

I dunno. Same as usual?

How bout you?

Nothing new, anyways.

[pauses]

‘S not so bad when we’re out here.

Yeah. And like.

[Hesitates.]

...when you're there, when I wake up. That's better, too.

Yeah. ...Yeah. It’s easier, when I’m with you.

[He doesn't say anything for a long little while, just watching the movie play. Then, real quiet:]

There's always a couple seconds, right when I wake up. When it's like - I can't get with it. Y'know?

And I don't know for sure, what part's the dream.

[pulle him in a little closer]

...Is there anything that helps? Like...looking at something, or touching something...

...yeah. Like I said, it - helps, when you're there.

[Nods, quiet]

Anything else? Or anybody? Since you head out sometimes.

[He's quiet for a couple of beats. Then, reluctant:]

I been practicing.

Being by myself, I mean. Gotta get over it sometime, right?

[Ridges her brows]

...Do you? I mean, it's not a bad thing, liking people around.

[Which is not exactly the issue, but]

Don't I? I mean... it's been a while.

Gotta pull it together eventually.

Yeah...

[Uncertain, though. Neither of them are from a background where 'walk it off' isn't the typical answer, but even so, from her expression, it doesn't feel right either.]

...I don't think you gotta rush it, though. Like...it's okay to start slow, too.

I mean, I worked through most of the other stuff that first week? But some of it's... just taking longer.

Kinda feel like it's way past slow by now.

It took a long time to happen, too, right? So long you wouldn't even say. I don't think anyone's gonna give you shit for not bouncing back in a month or whatever, so don't give yourself shit for it.

[Probably that argument would carry more weight if three people hadn't told him to get over it the first week.]

[But he can avoid it by just addressing the first part.]

...dunno how long it was in the first place.

[But consider: fuck those guys]

--Does it matter? What's the big hurry in the first place?

I mean, I'd kinda like to stop - [Being broken? Acting like a coward? Not pulling it together when Hiryuu seems just fine? All of those feel like they're more than he wants to admit to, though, so:] - sucking at some point, y'know?

You don't suck, don't even joke. And I'm not saying don't try anything. Just...think about what you're trying, I guess. If what you've been doing isn't helping, then let's try something different. Okay?

[But he wasn't joking. :x]

...like what?

[:')]

Like...

[Trails off, since she honestly isn't any more equipped for this than he is]

...Well, first things, what've you tried so far?

That's kinda it? I figured, it's gotta get easier sometime, right?

So I just been... staying out, some nights.

Okay. Where, with what?

Like, in an empty building? With, uh. With nothing.

I been leaving my phone, cause. Cause the sound helps, I keep wanting to put on movies or whatever.

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